Well, too bad. 'Cause I'm finna break it down again, homeschool-style.
I can't help it. I'm fresh from a homeschool convention. Nah, not a hippie unschooling convention. Much as I'd like to go! I've been drooling over a certain unschooling conference for 3 years now. But alas, I'm too broke to attend. The Rethinking Everything conference is all about freedom. Only it costs $150 a person to go, including children.
Which proves the point that freedom is, in fact, not free.
So Nature Boy and I attended a more affordable convention for the bargain price of $49. (Tree Guy couldn't go because he has to work to bankroll us freeloaders.) We both had a good time. A lot of moms go to homeschool conventions for the curriculum booths. They get discounts on next year's curriculum if they buy at a convention.
I go for the beer.
(Just kidding. Beer is gross.)
(Now, if they offered Lambrusco....)
On a serious tip, the real reason I go to homeschool conventions is the sessions. Attending those classes takes me back to my nerdy 4.0-having school days. I LEARN new stuff, and I get to TAKE NOTES! (Wheeee!) Sometimes a speaker really, er--speaks to me. There were two women at this year's convention who opened my eyes/mind/heart. I'll share about one of them today, and the other in a separate post.
One messenger I felt like shooting spoke about being the mother of teen boys. She said there's a change a-coming, and we have to roll with it or get left in the dust. When moms of adolescent boys cling to their itty bitty cutie-poos, what often happens is the opposite of what they intended.
She said, "We can choose to try to hold on to what we cannot keep (the little boy), or we can embrace that which has to come (the man he is becoming)." And she said that if we don't let go, we will either end up with a grown up little boy who forever needs his mommy, or a son with a hardened heart who continues to push us away.
And I was like, DANG! I don't want to give up kisses and hugs and spontaneous hand-holding and hair-smoothing and snuggling on the couch and deep conversations. I love that stuff. I live for that stuff. It makes me tear up just to type it. To think that in a few short years, my boy will be pulling away. To think that that's exactly what he is supposed to do!
How do moms survive the heartbreak of the teenage boy? Of snubs. Of avoiding kisses and hugs. Of suddenly being embarrassed to be seen with mom. You know, the woman who gave you life and changed your poopy diapers and let you in her bed when you had a nightmare and stayed up with you all night when you were sick and wipes all your tears away and is your biggest fan and would die for you! (Ugh, tears again.)
Yet, according to this speaker, letting go is necessary. It's essential to let our adolescent boys take the lead in determining the amount of closeness and affection and sharing. If we desire a close and loving relationship with our grown sons, we have to accept (endure!) the inevitable separation from us that is part of becoming a man.
And that sucks!
But it's probably true.
Which does not make it suck any less.
Have you gone through the teen years with your son and lived to tell the tale? If so, please share!
