January 10, 2012

Guest Post: Future Reflection

Below is a guest post written by my mom.
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As you all know, my mom passed on recently. She had come to stay with me. You probably don't know that I am an Empathic. I didn't always have that and I can no longer recall when it started. Funny, that. Anyway, when I worked at a local hospital, I found myself wanting to make sure no one ever died alone. Families go home. Sometimes they live far enough away that they can't be there and raise a family too. I think it may have been then that I noticed the energy zap caused by my patients who were actively dying. I would check the heart monitor for patients that weren't my own. Someone called me morbid. To my face... No tellin' what the untold stuff was. But all I had to do was look into the face of a family member who missed it after I told them how peaceful they went to know it was the right thing to do.

Even though I knew my mother was actively dying, she was gone by the time I got to her bed. She SNEEZED and that was it. I SWEAR. And I missed it! Besides the effects of the dementia, which had fast, fast forwarded, leaving her unable to walk, her falling blood pressure told everything. A lot of the time, there are other physical signs so maybe I was waiting for that. Or perhaps it was denial.

I had been staying awake until 3AM, just in case she woke up without knowing where she was. That night had followed a very restful day for her. Actually, I watched many of her deep wrinkles disappear. The day before had been a rough one. The hospice nurse sat me down and told me without asking, "You CANNOT overdose your mother with the Rx as it is written." I HAD been hesitant. Some of those heavy drugs can cause psychosis in some folks. She had stopped eating the day before. They kill your stomach when it is empty. I know this first hand. Hospice isn't my biz, so I did give her 2 of the 3. I never needed the 3rd.

She was peacefully letting go that day. I was hyper alert. Because in addition to this, my daughter and her family would be continuing the grieving that had begun when mom no longer spoke or would open her eyes. Many people to serve. As I said, it was a rapid decline. But I put relaxing music on and lit a lavender candle. I kept the lighting soft. Throughout the day I spoke with her. I told her to not be afraid. I told her she would soon see Dad coming her way to pick her up. I told her to run to him, that they had both been waiting for this day. I asked her to please kiss Collin for me and tell him that even though I get through every single day, I miss him being on earth every bit as much today as I did the day he died. I can still feel that absence in my physical body.

And yet, at 1:00AM, I became exhausted. I had had some severe body pain for 2 months that was letting up. I thought I was just wore slap out as they say in Texas. A good sleep at the end of a peaceful day, I was reaching for the lamp needing to sleep very badly. And she sneezed. And crossed over. I went to her. It was 1:17AM. I was in clinical mode and thought, "Wow! She's German. I wonder if there's some truth to the gesundheit thing." I did what anyone would do and decided to read up on it.

Of course you also don't know my personal spiritual beliefs. That's as it should be I guess, but one thing I believe strongly is that as Spirit, before our births, we have a hand in the life planning. Leading most of us to say, "If that is true, WHAT was I thinking?!". Don't bother to deny it... We know. And I thought maybe if God asked her how she'd want to go out, that it would have been just like Mom to say, "Like a fart in church." I think that God is a gentleman. Maybe He compromised with the sneeze. Both, after all, are escaping air.

Mother was also Jewish. They weren't raised as such as my grandfather was Catholic. So after I got beyond the superstitions, I found the answer. It's not only a German thing but a Hebrew thing too. So here is the answer. I trust you will find it as interesting as I did.

The following is a Jewish perspective on the custom: Although not technically part of Jewish law (Halacha), the custom of saying gesundheit, tzu gezunt, labreeyut, or bless you is considered a mannerly custom. It is written in the Talmud that the Patriarch Jacob was the first person to become ill before passing on. Before that, people would sneeze and die. When God infused the soul into man, He "blew it" into Adam's nostrils. Thus, when it came time for the soul to be returned to its Maker, it would leave through the same portal it arrived.

Makes perfect sense to me.

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