Revelation

I am tired of hiding who I am, y'all. Tired of pretending to be this boring, ordinary suburban homeschool mom and wife from the Bible Belt. Tired of wearing denim jumpers and carrying a big binder everywhere I go. Tired of living a life of quiet creative desperation, afraid to reveal the truth of who I am.

It's time for me to come out of the closet and announce to you all that I am a...

Thespian.

I know that this will take some getting used to.  It might help to know that Cynthia Nixon, Jodie Foster, and Portia de Rossi are thespians too.  It's possible to be a normal, healthy woman, and a thespian. 

Thank you in advance for accepting me. ;)

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Nature Boy and I both got roles in the musical we auditioned for last Sunday! We will be performing 9 shows in a community theater production of Oliver! The Musical.  NINE.  That's a lot.  With singing and dancing. Please pray that my Uncle Arthr-itis doesn't crash the party.  (Big women ask a lot of our knees as it is.) 

I was cast as an old housekeeper, Mrs. Bedwin.

I just want to say that the makeup artist is going to have a difficult time turning my hot self into an old, frumpy housekeeper.  A REALLY difficult time.  Especially with my left nostril upstaging folks left and right.  I shall try to contain my youth and sex appeal.  

Nature Boy got one of the lead roles: the Artful Dodger.

It's the role he wanted, so he's really excited. Since he's all blond and angelic-looking, he usually gets cast as royalty or a bullied kid.  Royalty isn't too much of a stretch, but playing a scared, wimpy kid isn't his favorite.  He's got a rep to maintain, you know. 

Here's his audition video.  I'm so proud.

Audition Vlog

So, this is one of those awkward videos filmed in a bedroom.

That didn't come out right.

What I mean is, you know how some folks on Youtube film makeup tutorials and singing videos in their bedrooms?  I'm sure it's because that's where their webcams are, but I've always found it a little weird/creepy.

And now now I'm doing one.

Bonus: If you look closely, you can see my gold tooth.

Berfday hilarity

I am so cracking up right now.

I was at Shrinky Dink's this morning, enjoying free coffee and homemade birthday cards (I'm 38!), when I decided to send a text to my old BFF from high school, Toni.  We haven't talked in a year or so, but I was thinking of her because I'd gotten out my old high school yearbooks to scan some pictures for my last blog post.  In one of the books, I'd written about Toni making a "bumlooker comment".  I don't remember the impetus or the context of the comment, but I do remember calling each other bumlooker (pronounced buhm-look-uh).  It made me laugh.

2 cool

+ 2 be      

   4 gotten

So I texted Toni.

Me:  Bumlooker.
Toni:  Who is this?
Me (thinking, she doesn't have my number saved in her phone!):  Who is the only person who has a history of saying bumlookuh!? 
Toni:  No idea.
Me:  You're getting old!  It's Dani.  I wrote about us in my senior book and just read it this week.  I'd forgotten about us saying bumlooker until I read it.
Toni:  Dani who?  This is Stephanie.

Yeah.

My first thought was that Toni was just messing with me.  Pretending not to know who Dani is!  Har har.  But then I remembered that Toni doesn't joke like that.  So I texted again.

Me:  Really?  Hahahaha!  My old friend Toni must have a different cell number.  Oops.  SORRY!  Lol!
"Toni"/Stephanie:  That's ok!
"Toni"/Stephanie:  I actually commented on my husband's butt right before you sent that and I thought someone was in my house!  Lol!  Scared the shit out of me!  Hahahhaa.

Which made the whole thing doubly awesome.

We chatted a little more, she wished me a happy birthday, and I sent her a postscript that my husband has a nice ass too.

If she was local, I bet we could totally be friends.